Sweet 16

November 1st, 2003

“I turn 16 in a few months. but I don’t feel like I am turning 16. I feel like I am turning 26.

Jesus, feel so old and I haven’t even lived yet!

What can I do???”

dazed confused

Liam’s Answer

I had a similar problem when I turned 26. Except I felt like I was only 16. It was awful. My face broke out in pimples. I had to re-enroll in high school, and I spent two years sneaking into nightclubs, until I turned 18 again.

In your case, you’re skipping all the awkward years. Of course, you’re skipping all the fun stuff, like experimenting with drugs, losing your virginity, having pregnancy scares.

But at least you’ll be able to get your driver’s licence immediately.

Chris’ Answer

It’s easy to be jaded. You’re problem is really that you feel more mature than everyone else you know. It’s making you old before your time.

Perhaps you have that premature aging disease that’s been going around: Werner syndrome.

If you do, you can expect to be dead by the time you’re 40. but by then, you’ll look like you’re 90 so arruably, you’ll have had a long life.

Luckily, they’ve just found out the gene which causes Werner syndrome. Get yourself to a doctor immediately to register yourself for a cure.

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Sweet 16