Stop Stressing My Parents

March 1st, 2004

“How do I become a better son?

I feel I stress out my parents too much and I want them to stop stressing about me?

What can I do?”


Liam’s Answer

Stressed out parents can be a total pain. They are constantly on your case about doing your homework, taking out the garbage, and not getting yourself killed from driving while your drunk.

Here’s a cure for helping to lower your parents’ stress levels. Study hard in school, go on to college, and study medicine. Become a doctor and prescribe them Serapax. Once the drugs kick in, their stress levels will plummet.

Chris’ Answer

The best way to lower the heart rate of an over-stressed parent is to tell them you are gay. And have AIDS. And now want to marry your cousin.

The shock of this news will cause them to have a massive heart attack, in which their heart stops beating entirely. And a heart rate can’t get any lower than that.

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Stop Stressing My Parents