HIV from a Hickey

December 4th, 2006

“If I give someone a hickey, do I get HIV or any other
disease?”

Jose Mendoza

Liam’s Advice

I don’t want to get all medical here because, despite what I say to girls in bars, I’m not a doctor. But we need some facts. The HIV virus is spread through the exchange of bodily fluids. Mostly it’s transmitted through exchanging blood.

Hickeys or love bites as they’re sometimes called, don’t actually involve biting. Hickeys are all about sucking on the skin to break the small sub-cutaneous capilliaries, and thereby cause a bruise.

Unless you’ve got lungs with a sucking power that exceeds a 2400 watt vaccum cleaner, you won’t even get close to breaking the skin.

So if there’s blood involved in a hickey, you’re doing it all wrong.

But hickey giving isn’t entirely safe sex. You are after all sucking and licking on someone’s unwashed skin. If you’re lucky, you’ve got no idea where it’s been. And if you’re luckier, you do because you’ve seen the videos.

Your partner’s skin could easily be carrying nasty germs that could make you very sick if you eat them. For example, say your partner recently bathed in a pool of e-coli. You suck hard on their neck, swallow the nasty bugs, and die. That’s a bummer of a teen romance.

Of course, if you’re prepared to snog someone who’s skin is green and slimy with bacteria, I’d say you got what was coming to you, but that’s another issue.

Chris’ Advice

Yes. You can get HIV – Hickey Impressiveness Votes – whenever you give a hickey to someone who has registered at RateMyHickey.com. At this fun web site, you can upload photos of your hickey, and let other users vote for how impressive it is, and add comments about other people’s fantastic hickeys.

RateMyHickey.com is a proudly sponsored by Preparation H, the world’s best hickey removal treatment.

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HIV from a Hickey