How Good A Criminal Are You?

Find out if you've got what it takes to make it to the top in the criminal world.

Complete our simple quiz.

1. You see $50 on the street. Do you:

Pick it up, think about taking it to the nearest police station then feel guilty about it, and give yourself up to police

Take it to the nearest police station

Mug an old lady because $50 is just not enough cash to support your $500 a day heroin habit

2. You drop soap in the shower. Do you:

Stop washing and flee

Take the soap from the guy next to you

Take the guy next to you

3. Martin Bryant is:

insane

in prison

inspirational

4. You walk into a bank with a stocking over your head, and say:

Right, give me all the money you've got in the safe

Right, give me all the money I've got in my account

Can someone give me a hand with this stocking, it's stuck

Everyone put your sticking hands up. This is a fuck up.

5. A man offers you a kilo of crack. Do you:

Shoot him and steal it

Explain that crack is a small space between two solid objects and there can't possibly be a kilo of it

Explain that crack is a small space between two solid objects and there can't possibly be a kilo of it, then while he's confused, shoot him and steal it.

6. The Godfather is:

a good movie

a good book

your godfather

a documentary of your life

7. Televisions come from:

shops

Santa Claus

the backs of trucks

8. "Perjury" means:

never having to say you're sorry

lying in court while under oath

getting off scott free

9. A stick of gelignite is:

a handy tool for breaking into bank vaults

illegal to possess except in the hands of licensed an explosives expert

a great toy for the kiddies

a type of jelly you eat at night

10. The government accidentally pays you unemployment benefits meant for someone else. Do you:

report the mistake immediately, and offer to pay interest to the DSS for the use of the money

spend it before someone notices

ring up to complain about not getting cheques for the other 15 aliases you've been using

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