Modern Dating

December 1st, 2003

“In these times of political correctness, how does one ask a girl out? Or do girls ask guys out now?”


Liam’s Answer

Let me correct a misassumption in your question, Moby. It has never been appropriate for a guy to ask a girl out. Ever.

In the old days, like, say Victorian England, one did not go on dates at all. One was never alone with a lady until one’s wedding night. All other interactions were in groups or chaperoned.

In the 1950’s you could go out with a girl, but you had you ask her father’s permission first. And you had to have her home by 11.

Then, in the 1970’s the sexual revolution came along, and you didn’t need permission to see a girl, but you had to have her home by midnight. And it was never too clear whether that meant your home or hers.

But the truth is, even the sexual revolution didn’t make asking a girl flat out “Wanna shag?” a successful dating technique. In my experience, most girls say “No.”

Instead, you’re better off following the time honoured tradition of acting so cool that you ignore her, and getting your friend to ask her friend if she likes you

It’s not a successful technique either, but it does save you the pain of rejection.

Chris’ Answer

Dating etiquette has changed a lot since the invention of mobile phones and text messaging. Now, entire relationships are started and flourish with saucy SMS messages. In fact, with a vibrating phone, many couples no longer bother to ever meet.

The best way to invite a girl on a date is to text her “Wanna d8?”

From experience, I’ve found the the standard response from most women is “Fuck off and die.” This is your hint that you’ll be having a quiet night in.

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Modern Dating