The X-Files – What To Do When Mulder And Scully Knock On Your Door

January 1st, 1999

After a recent visit backstage from the dynamic duo, the Gorskys have a few tips to pass on.

There’s nothing worse than unexpected guests, specially when you’re not expecting them. It’s even worse when those unexpected guests are FBI agents investigating the supernatural.

 The X Files   What To Do When Mulder And Scully Knock On Your Door

If Mulder and Scully happen to visit unexpectedly, there are a few guidelines you should follow to avoid any embarrassing situations.

  • Make sure you hide all alien carcasses
  • Sew the heads back on your voodoo dolls
  • Cover anything that contains the numbers 666 or a pentogram.
  • Make sure you dim the lights, these guys don’t like houses that are well lit. Make sure you do this quickly after they’ve knocked on the door, otherwise they’re likely to kick it in.
  • Try to drink any evidence of government conspiracies

Mulder and Scully are fun to talk to but you need to avoid a few topics of conversation. Whatever you do, don’t mention they look like a nice couple, or ask either of them how their sisters are.

Finally, for a bit of a laugh, cut two holes in a sheet, throw it over your head and walk around moaning like a ghost. They love it!

Chris Tomkins

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The X-Files – What To Do When Mulder And Scully Knock On Your Door

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