How To Find True Love In The Supermarket

April 1st, 2000

If bananas in your trolley isn't attracting a partner, being dressed AS a banana should do the trick.

True love can be found in the most unlikely places.

Romeo met Juliet at a party. Harry met Sally in a cross-country drive. Lois Lane met Superman at work.

This month, we show you how to find true love at your local supermarket.

  • A bunch of bananas in the child seat of his shopping trolley signifies that a man is single and searching.
  • A bunch of bananas in a woman’s trolley shows she is single but satisfied.
  • The sanitary napkins aisle is a great place to find women.
  • The fruit and vegetable section is a poor place to find single men.
  • The nappies aisle is a great place to meet single mothers.
  • The vanilla essence aisle is a great place to meet secret alcoholics.
  • The pre-prepared frozen dinner cabinet is a great place to find men.
  • “Can you direct me to the bananas?” is a good pick up line. “Let’s do it in the car park” is not.
  • Never ask a woman to join you in the pre-prepared frozen food cabinet for a quickie.
  • Buying engine oil shows you love your car. Buying sexual lubricant shows you love it too much.
  • Asking the checkout chick whether she “fancies a chomp on my banana” can have you arrested. Especially if there are none in your trolley.

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How To Find True Love In The Supermarket