Comments on: It Sucks To Be A Vampire

By: Skittles

Skittles — Thu, 02 Jun 2011 01:49:52 +0000

It would be terrible to be a vampire...or rather a gay pixie if you're a twilight fan

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By: The Awesome One Nesbit

The Awesome One Nesbit — Thu, 24 Mar 2011 18:00:32 +0000

you cant sleep...talk about bags under eyes

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By: Jordan

Jordan — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 07:17:19 +0000

they cant check themselves out in the mirror

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By: Jordan

Jordan — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 07:14:12 +0000

It sucks (no pun intended) because they have to admit they're of the same species as edward cullen. and they can't say 'it sucks' without saying 'no pun intended'

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By: stinkfoot

stinkfoot — Sat, 16 Oct 2010 04:42:55 +0000

You're out on the Town, you pick up a nice chicky-babe, you bring her home, one thing leads to another, you both adjourn to the bedroom, uh oh, how are you both going to fit in that coffin? You both squeeze in there and shut the lid, the coffin is rockin so hard it topples off the slab, the shock of the fall causes you to fart, the coffin has fallen on its lid so there's no way out, mercifully death comes quickly.

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By: Sal

Sal — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 12:00:00 +0000

Facebook status update:

Vampire girl: woo. Another night in eternity, another night biting people. So over it. Might go sun baking tomorrow and end this pointless existence.
(a week ago)

(6 days ago) turns out the sun just makes me sparkle. History got it wrong. Who knew? Could have got a tan 200 years ago gonna go get my brown on!

(2 minutes ago)
Still white AS. This blows. I bet the silver bullet thing is wrong too. My whole death I knew who I was, and what my limitations were now everything’s changing! Who am I? I feel so vulnerable. Can someone help me make sense of all this?

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By: RyanTheGreat

RyanTheGreat — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 11:14:45 +0000

Sharks are the only thing that can't kill a vampire at the beach. Everything else is fucking deadly to them.

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By: Risa

Risa — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 02:01:55 +0000

Since they turn into bats, they must be virtually blind with only slight vision and plenny o' sonar detection. The sonar detection might not be so bad, but not being able to wear glasses to fix your vision... On the OTHER hand... Since they can't reproduce...normally, no unplanned pregnancies!

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By: Dan

Dan — Sun, 12 Sep 2010 12:19:11 +0000

They can only get shift work. Or bouncer jobs.

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By: Dan

Dan — Sun, 12 Sep 2010 12:18:18 +0000

Vampires can only wear black. 3000 years of that might get boring after a while, just saying.

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