Hide the pimple. See if you can hide your acne without anyone noticing.
Kids seem to have all the fun at parties, don’t they. A bunch of five year olds experience more unbridled joy in a single birthday party than many adults experience in a year.
Why?
Because they play games.
It’s not fair, so we’re putting a stop to it. We’re introducing a new range of party games for adults that will be guaranteed to make your next party more fun than Christmas.
- Who Spiked My Drink? – someone spikes your drink with Rohypnol, and you have to work out who it is before you pass out.
- Hide and Seek – Hide from the annoying accountant who insists on explaining how goods and services taxes benefit all Australians.
- Twister – Dance badly to 50’s music until you hurt your back.
- Pass The Parcel – Re-gift a crap present to someone you hate.
- The Waiting Game – Holding off having a pee for three hours for fear of the gorgeous specimen you’re flirting with finding someone more interesting to talk to.
- The Weighting Game – Eating your own body weight in chicken wings and cheese cubes because you don’t want to look like no one is talking with you.
- Pin The Blame On The Colleague – Pin the blame on your colleague.
- Chinese Whispers - Start a vicious rumour and see how long it takes to get back to you.
- Chinese Whispers II - Walk into a room blindfolded, and tell a secret, and pray you didn’t tell the person who it’s about.
- Kiss Chasey – Find someone you want to kiss, get turned down, then pash everyone else at the party in a desperate attempt to make them feel jealous.
- Human Pyramid – Get drunk enough to shag your mummy.
- Tug of Waugh – Find a quiet room and masturbate to the cricket.
- You Show Me Yours and I’ll Show You Mine – Share the contents of your wallet or purse with someone in the vain hope it will make you seem interesting and shaggable.
Full Contact Musical Chairs Just like normal musical chairs, but when the music stops there are no restrictions. You can do anything to get that chair…. ANYTHING!!
Dude where’s my car Drive your friend’s car round the corner and see how long it takes them to find it after the party. 0 points if they find it straight away. 10 points if they take more than 10 minutes to find it. 100 points if they don’t find the car. 50 points if they take the wrong car.
Bum Darts – Make a line on the floor and place a shot glass on the floor about 3 feet away from the line, contestants must squeeze a quarter between their butt cheeks, waddle over to the shot glass, and release the quarter aiming for the shot glass. 50 points if you get it in, 25 if you hit the glass (but it doesn’t go in) and 0 points if you miss completely.
Beer Darts: Sit in a circle with your can of beer in front of you. Then take 3 metal tipped darts and through them at each other’s cans. If you poke a hole,they have to drink down to that hole. Be sure to bring band-aids, so you can be safe while you’re being dangerous.
Drunken Swap Get a bad drinkin’ partner with a good looking boyfriend. See who can drink the most tequila. Wait for her to pass out, then make out with her boyfriend. IT WORKS.
Pass the Porno After a friend is inebhriated, borrow his wallet and replace his licence with a photo of a naked woman. Next time he is pulled over by the cops driving home, the fun begins.
Child’s Play Contestants must take in turns to chew a mouthfull of chilli powder for one minute, then say, “Child’s Play”, loudly enough for everyone to hear
Pen The Donkey On The Tail See if you can get someone so drunk, your able to draw a picture of an ass on their ass.
Duck, Duck, Goose …..well, the goose part’s fun!
Get one of your friends really stoned or drunk. When they fall asleep, write all over there face. The next morning, if you can get them to go down to shop without them noticing that they have drawings all over their face, YOU WIN!! If they notice you lose.
Lucky Dip At the party go into the kitchen pantry, find the tinned cans, remove all labels, then place them back. See what the baked beans turn out to be
Go n Hide the Geek Blindfold the party geek, take him for a walk, pitch him into the first drug frenzied, violent bikers party you stumble across and place bets with your fellow party guests on how long it will take him to make it back.
Who’s fart is it? Walk into a large group of people, and then pass a gas. If you get somebody else to get the blame, you win. If you get the blame, you lose.
Jedi Nights Put on a glow-in-the-dark condom, and turn off the lights. Challenge anyone to a duel. The person who inflicts more damage by dick slapping wins. Whoever goes flaccid in the middle of the fight is automatically disqualified.
Act Like a Child The trick to this game is to act like an innocent eight-year old who doesn’t understand that maybe the pretty lady over there has a problem with people gawking up her skirt.
1 point for every peek you get, 10 for long ones, and 20 for long ones that she doesn’t notice.
If you get charged with sexual harrassment or abuse, that’s an extra 50 points.
Another 50 if the party stops for a minute while she’s shouting at you for being a sick pervert.
An extra 100 points if this arouses her and and she slips into bed with you. But that’s not likely to happen unless she’s drunk or desperate.
500 points for getting into jail.
1000 for dying that night. Of course then you’ll be dead, but you’ll have probably died happy.
Military ‘Can You Keep A Secret’ Game Convince everyone that you are in the secret service then tell them about the countries plans to invade small insignificant nations. By the end of the night, everyone will know the secret, but won’t know that anyone else knows.
Ride the Patrol Car At your best friend’s stag party, tell all the guys that you hired a striper dressed as a police officer. Make sure you didn’t.
Then slip out to your car and call the police and report a very loud and annoying party. Tell them it’s disturbing the peace of the neighbourhood.
Wait in your car outside the party.
Watch the female officer show up and your friends tell her to come in, put on music and start grabing her ass and put money inside her panties.
The game is over when your friends get out of jail.
Make me Unpopular! Hire a few actors and tell them to invade your party acting as heavily armed drug dealers looking for someone who owes them US$100,000 in cocaine. Make sure that they are looking for someone with the same name of the most desirable, cute and popular guy of the office, who always gets all the pretty chicks.
You win the game if the actors make the guy admit the crime, wet his pants and cry like a baby for his life.
Millions for the secretary Invite all the people from the office to your party, including your boss. Take a piece of paper and a lipstick, and write your boss a note telling that you want to have careless, wild sex with him and sign as his secretary.
See how long your boss can stay turned on dancing around her and rubing his hips against hers before she slaps him in the face and threats to sue him for sexual harassment.
If you want to win extra points, introduce yourself as an eye witness!
The Crying Game Wait till your ex-girlfriend is flirting with some new guy at a party. When she goes to the toilet, see if you can convince the guy that your ex-girlfriend is really a transexual. You win if she doesn’t go home with him.
Social Experiment Find a cute foreign (preferably French)lesbian in a bar. Sit across from her. Wait for your friends.
When they arrive neglect to tell them that she is a lesbian.
Wait for them to try and pick her up.
The best result is for them to fight over her.
e.g. Mr S engaged her in a deep and meaningful existential converstaion while Mr L who arrived later, taught her how to play “paper scissors rock”. When she started to win he changed the rules to include dynamite.
Wait until the following week to tell them the truth (its much more fun that way).
Score 2 points for finding a foreign lesbian willing to talk to drunk men on the pull. Lose a point for each of them that suceed in ‘pulling’.
It’s a hard one to lose.
Adult Pinata Get a really big bag and fill it with the refuse from the last party ie. Beer cans, dirty condoms, chips, half eaten meals, party hats etc. Suspend the bag from the roof and seal all exits. Then give guests a stick each and they can belt the crap out of the bag , and when the garbage spills out , tell them to clean it up , It was their mess to begin with.
Nasty Pussy Fight Night Tell girls that another girl is spreading lies about her and thinks that she wouldn’t be a match for her cause she thinks she can’t fight. Then go home with the winner or loser, your pick. It’s easy!
This is my life – Neck a copious amount of illicit substances, pick the happiest looking person there and tell them your life story at a rate of a thousand words a minute; key features of this game:
1. Never let them get a word in
2. Try to take only one breath per year of your life
3. Bonus points for most extreme mid-sentence lip-chewing gurn.
Other bonuses include scaring the recipient away from the room, scaring recipient away from party.
E.T Go Home Once you’ve been ‘got’ by the irritating loser who latches on to everyone in turn, spend the rest of the night watching for them to put their drink down so you can steal it each time they look away, until they think they must be really pissed and go home – then celebrate by drinking everything you nicked from them!
Finishing Move Go around to all the empty beer bottles and collect the last drops in a glass. Give it to the really drunk guy and get everyone to shout “CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!” and watch him pound the glass.
I’ll show you mine and I’ll show you mine Walk around the party with your bits out. There is no winner.
Drunk People Say The Darndest Things A new television show where people are reminded, with footage, of the stupid things they said the night before.
Mr Popular See how long you can wander aimlessly around the house before it becomes obvious to everyone in attendance that you don’t have any friends at the party, and no one wants to meet you because you are a sad moron. Then go home and cry yourself to sleep.
1. Lie upside down on the lounge
2. Inhale soda bulb and hold breath
3. Stand up and take a few steps
4. See how long it takes till you pass out and what magical dreams you have
5. The person does this the most without getting a head ache wins!